The other night, Holly and I went to a meeting with Andrea (the boy’s step mother), to learn more about dealing with kids with ADD/ADHD. While at the meeting, Holly’s parents came by to watch the boys. When we got home from the meeting, Gage was playing Halo with his Grandpa, and he told me as soon as I walked in “I’m dumping Tara tomorrow.”. I was curious what happened, so I asked. He said he found out Tara only went out with him so that another boy wouldn’t ask her out. He felt used, and was both sad and angry.

Holly got her catty girl defenses up, and demanded the whole story from Gage. After he filled her in, they together devised a plan for breaking Tara’s greedy little heart. He made a t-shirt (above) with a Sharpie, and then practiced what he’d say. He tried to convince Holly that the best way to do it, would be to get someone else to break up with her, but Holly knew that was what ALL grade 7′s do. Gage would be different – he would set precedence for break-ups at Prince Phillip.

He came home from school the next day smiling like a fool, and dying to tell me about what happened. I was having a smoke with my friend Anthony while we listened to his tale, and when he was done Anthony and I looked at each other and said the same thing – “I wish I was that cool when I was his age.”.

Here’s a brief summary of the story:

-Gage wore the shirt to school, under his hoodie.

-Once he got to school, he changed hoodies with another kid, so he could have a zip-up (props to him for realizing there was possibility for failure, or reduced coolness, by fumbling to tear off a pull-over).

-He waits until first break, then walks over and says “Hey Tara”.

-She says “Hey Gage”,and Gage responds with – “We’re done.”. He then turns around, rips his hoodie open and proceeds to walk down the hallway shouting “You hear that ladies? Gage is available!”

-He then came home and bragged about how he’s the king of the school, and about how much better he felt about the whole thing now.