Some of you may be aware that last year I wanted to start my own annual facial hair tradition much like Movember called Decembeard, where I would be permitted to let my facial hair get longer than an eighth of an inch – something Holly frowned upon. But here we are a year later, and now Holly and the rest of the general populous are madly in love with my beard, so I’m forced to pioneer yet another tradition.

I hereby declare 2011-2012 as the dawn of Janu- (or possibly Febru-) hairy. I hope to avoid trimming my beard (and hair) until the end of which ever month I actually decide on, but I’m guessing the minute Holly reads this she will turn to me and say something like “If you don’t trim that thing you’re not getting sex.”, and I’ll respond with something like “I’m going to trim my beard, can we do it?”, and she’ll roll her eyes and say “Good god, what’s wrong with you?”, and I’ll take the fact that she didn’t say no as a “Oh you know I wanna do it, bad!”.

Absolute fact: Chicks dig beards, the only reason some of them make us trim/shave them is jealousy.